Sunday, 13 January 2008


Am exhibiting old but familiar signs of real stress at the moment and have been for about a week. I'm having sleep trouble again and skin issues. I'm losing interest in sleeping - before, I had no trouble actually going to sleep, just trouble staying asleep. I don't go to bed until I can't stay awake any longer. I'm out of my normal routine - but I've had three weeks off over Christmas - and will really only get back into my normal routine from tomorrow onwards.

I *think* it's grief surfacing, to be honest, real nasty down and dirty honest grief for my parent. Normally I go to church on a Sunday but this morning offspring came in to wake me up - and I said "I'm not going!" and rolled over. The thought of getting out of bed and even of going to church made me want to cry. I just wanted to cry for mum all day.

Instead I've done classic avoidance stuff: reading Michael Crichton and surfing the Net. I can't bear to have a quiet moment.

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